Why do my closest friends hate me all of the sudden? I don't know why I'm such a horrible person that I have to be treated like dirt all of the time. Yesterday, one of my closest friends lied to be over a little thing like shopping for prom. She said first that she was going with her date, and now, she says she's going with one of the teachers here. When I asked her if she wanted to go about 2 or 3 weeks ago. Am I just being oversensitive, or is there a problem with this?
And someone else was yelling at me last night because I tried to be helpful. Not that I should be surprised, because he always does, and only feels guilty if I start to cry. Why do I have to put up with these people!!!! Don't I deserve better than that. I work my butt off to make friends and keep them, because I haven't had a whole lot of friends in my lifetime. Even at Allen East, my "friends" would only hang around me if it was convenient. I remember when one of them was having a b-day party and she told me the day before that she would call me and tell me when it was. She didn't and when I asked her about it the next day, she said that another of our friends had gone to her house and they were having too much fun, so she forgot me. Now some of the same stuff is happening again. I can't stand this.

So yesterday, we had an assembly. It was really interesting. YOu guys miss everything. This guy was hillarious because he ended up offending almost everyone who actually listened to what he was saying, and not just laughing about his antics. He basically said that all girls are crazy and easy, and all guys are horny jerks. How do you like that? I tell you what Tabby and I weren't at all happy. First of all, would anyone in their right mind be able to consider ME easy? or crazy? Towards the end of it he tried to make up for offending everyone, but it didn't work.He did have a few good points, but the way he presented them was awful. Basically he said that there is no such thing as love, only guys wanting sex any way they can get it, and girls wanting only to have a boyfriend, just for the sake of having a boyfriend, not particularly wanting the whole love thing. And he called all girls whores. He said that we all dress like whores. Do I? Does Brittany? or Jess? Or Maggie? Or Tabby? Or Christa? Or Megan? Maybe it's just me, but that's a lot of people, so not everyone can be whores. Skank!!!

Sadies is on Friday. I just found out yesterday. But of course I have orchestra and can't go. It always works that way. They end up cancelling on a date that I can come, to move it to a date that I can't.
My week is going to be really busy this week. yesterday, I had writing at ONU, and we have a paper due on Wednesday that I don't have what I need. I also have a paper due in English on wednesday, and I don't know what I'm writing about. Today, I have string ensemble and then orchestra practice until 10 tonight. Tomorrow, I have all of those papers due, and then church, and tutoring. I did get that other job. and Friday, I have orchestra again, as well as Saturday, and then the concert on Sunday. I'm so excited, though. The ice cream stand in Lafayette is opening on Sunday. We are going to stop there on the way home from the concert.

Last night was really fun. But I think we needed about 5 more people in Maggie's room. We still had too much room to breathe.
I have to turn in my writing 1 paper today. I think it might be okay because I had a meeting with my professor on Wednesday, and it went really well. He liked my paper. I wrote a rhetorical analysis on affirmative action. It was really hard, and even though it took much longer than any of my high school papers, it wasn't too bad. It didn't take as long as I expected.
I need to e-mail Volleyball player, so I'll talk to you later.

I am so tired today. I'm excited to go to Maggie's today, though. I have a class at ONU at 1, and then I come home for a half an hour,and go to tutoring, but then I should be done with everything, except finish my paper for Writing 1.

So yesterday, I had an orchestra rehearsal from 7-9 in the evening. We played 2 straight hours, with no break. It really sucked.
There is a possibility that I may get another kid to tutor. The kids family will pay me. It is supposed to be for NHS but they want someone to come to their house, so they will pay them. I said that if they could work it out with my schedule, I would tutor them. So that might be another $20 or so a week.

I had so much fun on Friday night. Despite the fact that I had to see Blake's bare butt, it was great, although I luckily didn't have to see him from the front.

I can't wait until Thursday. it 's going to be great.

I'm thinking about asking Jason if he wants to come. I want him to meet all of you, but I'm afraid that he will be scared off.

I can't wait until tonight. I can't wait to see everyone again.

Yesterday, Katy, Brittany, Tabby and I went window chalking at the firehouse. It was really fun, even though they called us knuckleheads because Onion spelled Willard wrong.

I was up until 11:40 last night because we were at the game, and then I had to write a paper for college. I tried to stay up and finish it, but I was too tired, and my throat hurt from screaming at the game. So I had to get up at 5:00 this morning. I was up from 5 until 6:15, and then slept until about 7. It was a good thing that we had an hour delay today, although I would have had a 2 hour delay. That sucks. I just thought about that. Oh, well.

Yesterday, I was talking to Richia, about what Kathrin and Mom said about Jason. What was weird, is that she told me that she and another friend from church had recently talked about the same thing. How strange is that?
Anyway, last night on the way to church I asked Jason to come to prom. It was funny, because he didn't say yes right away, but waited a few minutes, and then asked what color suit he should wear. So now I have a date for prom. Does this count, am I on the dark side yet?

So Jess should be happy about this. I finally decided that I'm going to college in Bowling Green. I went down to Nashville this week end and met the viola person. I was far from impressed. So I really don't have a choice. I have to go to BG.
Anyway. We were at a mall in Nashville, and all of the sudden my mom said," If you want to go to prom, I'd bet if you ask Jason, he will go." Jason is a kid from Findlay, and he goes to school at UNO. Since he's in Lima, he comes to our house every Wednesday for supper, and then goes to church with us. It was just so surprising, that my mom said this. So I called Kathrin last night, and she said the same thing. What was scary was that she was thinking that I should ask him out, even before mom said anything. She had only met him once, though. It was just really weird. What do you guys think. Should I do it?

I'm excited to go home tonight. I forgot to mention that yesterday there was a kid at Wapak who brought a gun and stuff for bombs to school. They didn't find out about it until after school, so I wasn't there, but I heard that they had to call the Lima Bomb Squad and brought in bomb dogs after they evacuated the building.

I have officially been accepted at BG as a music major. It's not my first choice of school, but it is my back up. And there's no denying that it is an excellent music school. My viola teacher let me know apparently right after they found out. What I don't understand is why Heather Merritt has not made it yet. She's told me all about her auditions, and she's done really well, but still hasn't been accepted as a music major. I think it only matters who you know, rather than how good you are.